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  • Dr. Jacqueline Cahalan

Choose your battles

Reminder: You don’t need to engage in every struggle that is presented to you. One way to help avoid a power struggle or confrontation when your child says something provocative or fresh or antagonistic is to say “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that.” This tells your child that you did, in fact, hear exactly what they said, but you are choosing not to engage on that issue. You don’t need to fight every battle and you are generally better off when you are selective on what issues you need to hold your ground on. Try to be intentional, value-oriented, and have a longer-term orientation on this. Ask yourself, “what do I want my child to learn in this moment” and remember that you often teach your kids more from your actions as than from your words.



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